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Homosexuality in the Arab world is a topic so volatile that in some countries death is the penalty. however gradually and really cautiously gay Arabs are taking off of the closet with increasing confidence. Spanning across twenty two countries with a combined population of 323 million, the Arab world isn't solely connected through its language however is also linked through varied gay Arab websites, chat rooms, and blogs.

However, for gay Arab Americans, although they live with abundant bigger personal freedoms they typically still realize themselves conflicted between their sexual, religious, ethnic/cultural and national identities. Meet Issam Khoury of Washington, DC and Ramy Eletreby of los angeles. They each are gay Arab men however each with a totally different path and background. but both men have an interesting clarity and an agreement on the crucial issues that impact them the most.

Issam Khoury

A refugee by birth and by war, Issam Khoury has seen and experienced a broad cross-section of the planet. each of his oldsters were born and raised in Palestine but because of the politics surrounding the Israeli occupation, Issam was forced to be born and raised in Kuwait till the age of thirteen. "I learned what it meant to differ in being in Kuwait as a result of as a non Kuwait you are continuously perceived different" he explains.

But when Iraq invaded Kuwait in 1990, Issam's family was forced to live in Cypress where Issam finished his schooling. once more he felt the unspoken words and perception of being completely different in another country.

As a youth Issam began to become additional responsive to his burgeoning homosexuality. "I continuously knew i used to be drawn to men. I knew from the times once I was living in Kuwait which to me debunks the myth that many Arabs would love to possess that this does not exist in our part of the world as a result of it does. after I moved to Cypress in 95' I found myself changing into sexually active and that is how I knew that this was here to stay" he reveals.

Issam later attended school in the US, first graduating from Virginia Tech, then onward to Ohio State to earn a masters degree and then forward to yank University where he's currently earning a doctorate in cultural studies.

He admits that it wasn't till school that he started to become fully tuned in to his identity as an "outwardly gay man and not someone who engages in sex with different men" he explains. In many ways his college years helped him to adopt a holistic identity that was related to his sexual orientation, but this was solely the primary step.

He reveals that his chat for arabs journey still was "very troublesome as a result of I even have no examples i don't have any James Baldwin's we don't have any Gloria Anzaldua's, we do not have any of these within the Arab community. There are gay folks out there and they are out and they're proud, however they do not write, they are doing not represent, they have not laid the foundation for a community within the same way that yank ethnic communities have had on varying levels."

As a result, Issam found nurturing support within the African american community adding that he was "adopted" by several black individuals and that "in the black community...I found my identity as a man of color.

I really found my identity as a gay man of color through reading E. Lynn Harris. I found it inspiring to read about men of color loving other men and color. I found my identity and what it could be to be during a relationship with another man of color and the way stunning that might be and the way celebrated that could be without having to be ashamed of it."

In terms of his Arab identity, Issam says that he found his Arabic-self through his masters degree program at Ohio State where he studied Arab literature. He openly admits that he had a "big aversion" to white people after being known as a "sand nigger, camel jockey, and towel head" throughout his faculty years. therefore this new tutorial program gave him each affirmation and confirmation of who he extremely was, thus casting away all labels and stereotypes.

"It was in my masters program that I found myself as an Arab man" he proudly states. However, the reconciliation of being Arab, Gay and Christian was still a protracted, arduous and sophisticated process. after kicking off to his parents, he we tend to went into the closet for 6 years.

"It took plenty of internal work for me to merge my Arabic and my gay identities. It took a lot of soul looking out, it took plenty of research; delving into the difficulty of Arabic and gay but it's extremely slow. we have lots issues of pride in Arabic community and pride is expounded to family honor and if someone is gay then you shame family honor and thus these problems don't seem to be widely talked about but mentioned in closed circles" he shares.

Because of his journey of transformation and reconciliation Issam decided to enroll in an exceedingly cultural studies doctoral program because he recognized that he belonged to too several numerous groups to limit himself to just one identity or concentration. "The us thrives on identity politics; it is the capital of what I call the check box on the application as a result of you always have to be one thing you mostly ought to be categorized as something."

Further, Issam's own diversity and his want to find out about the diversity of others led him out of his personal check box. he's a member of a black fraternity and is currently learning to talk Spanish, all in a shot to broaden his exposure and understanding of culture and diversity.

Ramy Eletreby

Born and raised in sunny Southern California behind the conservative and affluent curtain of Orange County, Ramy Eletreby, who is of Egyptian descent, grew up the youngest of three children. while both of his parents were born and raised in Egypt, Ramy's perspective includes a distinct american flair. He says that he was raised "conservative and Muslim" which his upbringing has helped shaped him to where he is these days.

Ramy's gay awakening truly began round the age of 15. He remembers attending a play in la that focused around boxing. during a locker space scene, one in all the boxers actually showered on stage. it absolutely was Ramy's first time seeing a unadorned man.

"I was flustered and blushing and every one that stuff and that i simply knew that if I had a reaction like that it should mean something. I never had such a powerful reaction of anybody like that. I could not avert my eyes but deep down I knew I mustn't be enjoying it."

Interestingly enough, Ramy did not act out sexually on his urges. Instead he went through a personal journey seeking to reconcile his sexuality along with his Muslim beliefs. "I went through plenty of self exploration, a lot questions, and lots of confusion" he explains.

Similar to the path of many different gays, Ramy eventually mustered up enough courage to start out commencing to his friends. after an eight year period he had initiate to just concerning everybody in his life with the exception of his circle of relatives, however that was close to change in a very public method within the summer of 2005.

A budding actor, Ramy Arabic chat decided to simply accept a task at a Hollywood theater portraying a gay Arab. but sure Arab community teams discerned of the play and its gay content and commenced to protest. Meanwhile the LA Times bloodhounds sniffed out the story and surrounded down playhouse to try to to what eventually became a serious news story concerning the play, its gay content, the controversy, and therefore the incontrovertible fact that its lead actor, Ramy was a gay man.

When the story hit, Ramy estimates it took four folks reading it before the news was promptly delivered to his parents. additional attention came when Advocate Magazine conjointly did a selection on him. it had been a particularly stressful and an emotionally raw time for him, however nowadays he is out to everyone and living his life authentically.

And once many years of wrestling with each his spirituality and his sexuality, Ramy has finally found the peace that he's been finding out since he was fifteen. "I've simply return to the conclusion that not everything is perfect. This faith that i used to be raised in is not perfect" he explains. He adds that individuals who subscribe to a spiritual belief system should "apply but much you can apply to your life and since i do know I cannot change bound facts regarding who i am....if i choose to own a religion like Islam it must be as much as I can take of it."

Today Ramy works for a gay publication in la where he says it's helped him to search out his gay identity. However, he sees no back and forth competing of his multiple identities of being gay, Arab, and Muslim. "I've never allowed it to be a fight; it's simply a part of my daily reality. i am an Arab american who happens to be raised Muslim who considers himself for the most part Muslim but i'm an yankee who is of Arab descent."

He adds Arab chat that "your identity is who you're at any given moment. there's never daily where i'm not Muslim or do not not view myself as a product of Muslims. i'm ready to bear a day and understand that elements of my determine are speaking up and the way I can filter those to come to a focused stop process through any given state of affairs."

Advice to Young Gay Arabs

While Issam and Ramy were ready to move higher than and beyond the conflicts of their multiple identities, there are many alternative young gay Arabs who are still baffled by it and struggle with it daily.

Issam offers this piece of recommendation to gay Arab youth. "You are not alone, you are not the sole gay Arab person out there. you are not the only young man or young girl who's struggling with this. notice where the myth is; notice the very fact and where the two separate. Do your analysis. Dispel the myths for yourself."

Ramy agrees adding that "the solely person that you actually have to be compelled to listen to is yourself. you can't allow those who have taught you as a toddler, or your folks, or family members, non secular students, siblings, friends. you cannot permit people to make decisions regarding your life and what is right about you without you involved. therefore do not act outside of your best interest."